It is slowly dawning on me – very slowly – that Lev will never be coming back. I am starting to understand that this is permanent. I will not be going back in time, I will not be crossing over to a different multiverse, I will not be waking up from a nightmare. And somehow this realization is a good thing. I prefer genuine sadness over bullshit happiness. I want to understand and accept what has happened, so I can begin the long and slow healing process, even though I know that true inner peace is an elusive and likely unobtainable goal.
