Jaal leaves tomorrow.
We all head down to Seattle.
He will play with Tony's band.
Then, stay with friends and head out to Olympia.
His professors know his situation.
They want to help and understand.
I hope his friends are understanding.
Jaal will hold it together.
He misses Lev, yet keeps it mostly hidden.
The teary eyes, the little comments.
Family counseling fun.
He is worried about us.
I am worried about us.
The house will be empty, lonely, vacant
We need to move, we know it.
Being with Jaal drives my days.
I love to feed him, be with him, do whatever as long as it's together
I am not ready for the empty nest
It is a nest that has been destroyed
It must be rebuilt with fragments of our old selves
Laced with sadness and despair
I miss him.
I wonder why he won't come back soon
I wait, still.
Denial allowing me some moments of peace
Too much loss
